Everyone loves a good joke, and if you’re in trouble with the law, then funny bail bond and county jail jokes could be your saving grace. Police officers and bail bondsmen often have to deal with some serious situations, but that doesn’t mean they can’t take a lighthearted approach when it comes to their work.
Here are some of the best jokes about jail and bail that will get you out of any sticky situation. Whether you need a laugh or just want to impress your local cop or bail bondsman, these jokes are sure to put a smile on your face!
Get Ready to Laugh With These Jail and Bail Bond Jokes!
Top Ten Bail Bondsmen Jokes
1. What did the bail bondsman say to his son when he wanted to become a lawyer? He said, “No way! You’ll end up on the other side of this business!”
2. How do you know when a jail is full? When there are no more bail bondsmen available outside.
3. Why did the criminal get upset with the bail bondsman? Because he charged him an arm and a leg for his bail!
4. What did the judge say when the bail bondsman failed to post bond in time? He said, “You missed your chance – no more free passes from this court!”
5. What does a bail bondsman have in common with a magician? They both know how to make people disappear!
6. What did the bail bondsman say when his client asked for a refund? ”No chance, you’re stuck with me!”
7. What does a bail bondsman and an accountant have in common? They both know how to count their money!
8. Why is it so hard to get out of jail if you don’t have any money? Because the only way out is through a bail bondsman, and they aren’t free!
9. Why do criminals always seem to hire the same bail bondsman? He’s got all the connections – he knows which judges are lenient on bond amounts!
10. How does a jailed suspect describe his bail bondsman? He says, “He’s like my very own “get out of jail” card!”
And a Few More Jokes Just for Fun…
Q: What did the judge say when a skunk was brought into court?
A: “Odor in the court!”
Q: What did the bail bondsman say to the criminal after he was released from jail?
A: “Don’t make me come back here again!”
Q: What did the picture maker say when asked why he was in jail?
A: “Because I was framed!”
Q: Why don’t criminals like going to jail?
A: Because it’s no joke!
Q: What did the criminal say when his bail bondsman asked for collateral?
A: “Do you take cash or credit?”
Q: What did the jailbird say to his friend when visiting him in prison?
A: “It’s not so bad here – at least the meals are better than hotel food!”
Q: What did the prisoner say when his release date was postponed?
A: “No bail – no tell!”
Q: What did the criminal say to the judge just before sentencing?
A: “Your Honor, this is a joke, right?”
Q: What did the paving contractor say to the bail bondsman when asked why he was in jail?
A: “Because I tried to break out of a rut!”
Q: What did the jailbird say when his release date was changed?
A: “That’s one less day I have to spend behind bars!”
We hope these jokes provided some much-needed comic relief! If you or someone you know is ever in need of a bail bondsman, make sure to contact us at 317-876-9600 for speedy and secure bail bond services in Indianapolis, Indiana. We offer prearranged bail bond service for arrest warrants and probation violations, too. From all of us here at Woods Bail Bonds, have a great day and stay safe!